September 1, 2004 Welcome to the Barren Realms MUD Newsletter: Visit us at telnet://barren.coredcs.com:8000/ or our web site at http://www.barrenrealmsmud.com/ Please send me articles, replies, anything.. ----------------------------------------------- IDEAS: Xer: Is bloodhound snout permenantly not going to work? Andasa: Help age displays the equation to determine how many hours you've played from your age IDEAS, REPLIES AND ARTICLES ACCEPTED! ----------------------------------------------- Kiri's WWW of Urls: You are so great http://www.cse.unsw.edu.au/~geoffo/humour/flattery.html Radio http://windowsmedia.com/radiotuner/MyRadio.asp From Bluestar, Pencil Sketch http://www.mydavinci.com/j/product.jsp?product=pencilsketch&style=Realism&productName=Pencil%20Sketch&from=49.95 From Scavenger http://www.emotioneric.com/ ------------------------------------------------- The Top 14 Tips for Surviving College 14. Minimize food budget by scheduling classes around Happy Hour. 13. Enjoy being a Sophomore -- It will be the best three years of your life. 12. Wear an athletic cup to panty raids, because it's all fun and games until someone loses their 'nads. 11. Lemon juice and baking soda make an excellent bong water stain remover. 10. Earn extra cash by parlaying chemistry knowledge into lucrative "home pharmaceuticals" business. 9. If an 8:00 am class is required for your major, change your major. 8. Boring lecture? Start a wave! 7. College-level algebra: 5 returnable bottles = 1 delicious Ramen Noodle dinner. 6. "I Phelta Thi" is *not* a real fraternity, except at state colleges. 5. Remember - almost no one complains when you puke in a dumpster. 4. Clever margin manipulation can turn a 4-page outline into a 100-page senior essay. 3. Football games were never meant to be observed by sober people. 2. Don't think of it as sleeping with your professor -- think of it as "acing Biology." and the Number 1 Tip for Surviving College... 1. In a pinch, beer can be used as a milk substitute in your breakfast cereal. September 24, 2004 Welcome to the Barren Realms MUD Newsletter: VIsit us at telnet://barren.coredcs.com:8000/ or our web site at http://www.barrenrealmsmud.com/ IDEAS - feel free to reply to these: Home: for demons when a you get a new limb that will replace a rotten one, it sould say that its growing under the rotten one. i hate haveing a good limb replaced by something when i think its going to take over a rotten spot. Invision: a followlist, lets you see the names of everyone following you Rhyme: when you bamf a mob successfully, all of their equipment and gold fall to the ground. :-) Twinkie: clean up the syntax so you either always use quotes or never use quotes for two word spells. e.g. prac and cast have different syntax. always using quotes seems more practical ---------------------- These characters must log in or will lose their characters after 1 1/2 years of not logging in: Alark, Avantine, Bigpotpie, Bleschu, Bloodmaul, Boc, Booya, Bushwack, Cerius, Chromium, Covington, Danor, Deadlydwarf, Eeek, Ender, Fall, Fierce, Gabriella, Goldensun, Gundam, Gypsyb, Harmeny, Headcleaver, Hoosier, Iorek, Janie, Jimmyc, Kire, Lowcarb, Marian, Niki, Nimbus, Nimyn, Pepe, Sammantha, Silverstar, Solitude, Spyke, Straad, Tea, Thordain, Tnviking, Tsunami, Vantor, Wasabe, Zaxxon, Zhade ------------------------ Article by Bluestar: Good evening, and welcome to another addition of BR News. I'm your host Blue. On today's show we have a very special guest. He was once known for the dangerous life he led in the form of drug dealing, but he now spends his days selling maps to different areas throughout the Realms. We're very happy to have him here today, so everyone put your hands together for Aod the Dealer!!!! Aod: Thank you Blue, it's a pleasure to be here today. Blue: We're glad to have you Aod. So tell me, how is this new endeavor of map selling working out for you? Do you miss the days of dealing drugs? Aod: Well Blue, I can tell you some of the things that I don't miss. For one, people don't try to kill me anymore, that is always a good thing in my book. Blue: * laugh * I can imagine! Please go on. Aod: Well, that's it really. When I was a drug dealer I could make money much quicker, today I wander around Calathar rather aimlessly hoping someone will want a map. It's a slow business. Also when I changed businesses, I had to get rid of my condom, it was scaring away the customers. Do you realize how hard that makes it on me? There are a lot of very attractive women running around Barren Realms you know. All I can offer them are some topographical maps... [While Aod says this last comment he looks as though he is in deep thought about those particular maps...] Blue: I see. Well, that does seem like it might be rather difficult for you. Have you ever considered being a one-woman man? Aod: [He starts laughing hysterically here and needs 15 minutes to calm back down to a point where he can once again speak] Blue: Well I guess that answers my question.... Monogamy is not anywhere in the picture for you then. Aod: [dead silence] Blue: Moving right along then! Do you have any advice for other drug dealers that might want to get out of the business? Aod: [Again starts laughing and then begins to twitch] Don't do it man! Look where it's left me! Drugless, condomless, womanless!!!! [Starts to sob] Blue: Okay then.... Well this has been another addition of BR News, I'm your host Blue, stay tuned next week when we investigate what is really in those pot pies that we all know and love, and remember, BR News has got your back. Blue: [Thinks she is off camera] Where are those writers? We need a better closing line. I mean, who the heck came up with, "BR News has got your back," anyway? Geeze! What do I pay you fools for?!? ------------------------- Kiri's WWW of urls: Chocobo dance! Care of Scavenger http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view.php?id=58184 A fascinating political theater project http://www.deargeorgeletters.com/ From Scave, the name says it all http://spamusement.com/ The most amazing paper you will ever see http://www.langorigami.com/Art/IA/IA-01.html -------------------------------- From Dove: My Housekeeping Philosophy 1. I don't do windows because ... I love birds and don't want one to run into a clean window and get hurt. (I am compassionate) 2. I don't wax floors because ... I am terrified a guest will slip, hurt themselves, I'll feel terrible and they may sue me. (I am careful and poor) 3. I don't mind the dust bunnies because ... they are very good company, I have named most of them, and they agree with everything I say. (I am imaginative) 4. I don't disturb cobwebs because ... I want every creature to have a home of their own and my family loves spiders. (I am kind) 5. I don't Spring Clean because ... I love all the seasons and I don't want the others to get jealous. (I am fair minded) 6. I don't plant a garden because ... I don't want to get in God's way, he is an excellent designer. (I am courteous) 7. I don't put things away because ... my family will never be able to find them again. (I am considerate) 8. I don't do gourmet meals when I entertain because .... I don't want my guests to stress out over what to make when they invite me over for dinner. 9. I don't iron because ... I choose to believe them when they say "Permanent Press". (I am trusting)