WELCOME TO A BRAND NEW LOOK FOR THE NEWSLETTER! The Newsletter NOW comes in a HTML format. If you'd like the get that version of the newsletter, please hit reply and include (COLOR) in your subject line and I'll send this and all future newsletters in html format to you. If you have any graphical donations, please send them my way. :) Now on with the show! Pickpocket: Shouldn't ill's get rescue? They do have great AC... (Yet another) Idea for the noble Illithid: Spell: Heat Metal The elf and druid command the primal energies of the energies of the universe, harnessing them to create flashy spells and wasted effort. The Mind Flayer, however, often focuses upon the smallest particles, rather tha= n the binding forces of reality, to create effects just as powerful. Like in the spell 'Agitation', the caster applies his mind to vibrate the bonds between molecules and create heat. Rather than focusing on a living being, however, the illithid casts the spell on the clothing and equipment of the target. Cloth and leather catch fire, and metal soon becomes searing hot. Obviously this causes damage, and the more armor and weapons being used, th= e more damage the spell creates. Damage also increases as the caster's level rises and his(/her) mental abilities improve. Level =3D ? Note: would it be too powerful if the spell includes a chance (10%-25%) tha= t the target drops their weapon, as with disarm? There were more ideas but I forgot them. It's too &#%! late... *The more I know, the more I know I don't want to k= now* -Nolan "Rabies" Irving ******* ************** *** *** ************** **** ***Barren Realms*** **** *** *** *** *** *** ******* *** *********** ** ** *********** ***************** Technical Guru's Newsletter By CALLER >The Viral Epidemic > > Warning, warning. Norton Antivirus has detected the presense of > a virus. Press any key to continue. > > >Sadly, more and more people are seeing this message, or one like it,=20 >flash up on their computer screens each year. Estimates cannot imagine=20 >the number of dollars spent each year, both in preventing attacks, and=20 >repairing from attacks that circumvented prevention techniques. > >Computer viruses come in many forms. From your basic Monkey virus, to=20 >your Encrypted Hidden Stealth virus. Although viruses have been around=20 >nearly as long as hackers, no virus has gotten as much attention. =20 Until=20 >the WIN95.CIH virus, which some have labelled the worst virus ever. =20 > >Every 26th of every month, the media talks about this virus. The virus=20 >is triggered by the 26th showing up on your computer, and when it is=20 >triggered, it reacts violently, overwriting the BIOS data (startup=20 >information), on the BIOS chip. Now, this affects diffrent motherboard=20 >configurations diffrently. Some have a BIOS chip which is plugged into=20 >the motherboard, and the BIOS can therefore be erased. Others,=20 however,=20 >have fused in chips, and the whole motherboard must be replaced. > >Two popular multi-player servers (names withheld for privacy) were=20 >infected with the virus, and passed it onto end users. As soon as they=20 >discovered the problem, they shut the system down for a total whipe. =20 >Pretty responsible, eh? What the ommitted doing is telling gamers=20 >(until a fix was posted). > >Sadly, viruses will always have some power. " The only system which is=20 >truly secure is one which is switched off and unplugged, locked in a=20 >titanium lined safe, buried in a concrete bunker, and surrounded by=20 >nreve gas and highly paid guards. Even then, I wouldn't stake my life=20 >on it" ( Gene Spafford, Director, Computer Operations, Audit, and=20 >Security Technology (COAST) Project, Purdue University ) That pretty=20 >much says it all > >And, I was rebuked by readers for portraying the Hacker challange=20 wrong. =20 >I assumed I was clear, however Obviously I was not. There is no danger=20 >to a computer which is turned off, or not connected to a phone line. =20 >Sorry for any undue panic. > >I'm Muddman, and this is my TechNews > >Note: TechNews is looking to be carried on websites all around the=20 world=20 >wide web. If you are interested in this free article generating you=20 >hits, please Email me with the URL (Email@: muddman2@hotmail.com) /(*) | / | |\--------------------------------------------\ (@)(((((((( | >-------------------------------------------- > | |/--------------------------------------------/ | \ \(*) HAMELIN REVIEW BY HEALINT: After passing the Pied Piper I ran into the town of Hamelin... The poor town was over run with rats, everywhere you looked rats=20 forceing out most of the inhabatants of the city ... still there are a few people waiting for someone to help kill all the pesky critters, they keep gnawing at everything and even tried to start on me ... after visiting the Mayor and Councilmen and telling the other people still left in town to hang in there I had to leave I HATE RATS !!!!!! Healint /(*) | / | |\--------------------------------------------\ (@)(((((((( | >-------------------------------------------- > | |/--------------------------------------------/ | \ \(*) Kiri's Wide World of URLS: HEH First the serious. There are two services on the 'Net which I this are excellent. And no, I don't get paid by them. First is Collegeclub -- a service for college students. http://www.collegeclub.com/ They give out free webpage space, email address, and yes, voicemail. I have created a group on there for Barren Realms players under the games category. If people join it, I'll make sure to post whenever there are issues (such as technical difficulties or whatever) up on the board. And you can feel free to post as well. Second, PlanetAll! http://www.planetall.com/ Okay here I kinda lied. If you sign up and mention my name when you do (Karen Fehlker) I get a nice little point towards frequent fliers miles. And you KNOW you want to be nice to your Kiri, right? *grin* This is a cool service that provides links to lots of people you've known. Its hard to explain, so go check it out. There's also a BR spot there. Now for the two fun sites of the week. http://www.themoonlitroad.com/ This site has to be one of the BEST sites I've ever seen. Its a siter requiring realaudio that has writers read their own ghost stories to you in spooky voices. PERFECT for Halloween. Check it out :) Blame this one on Marc and Soleil. http://www.activegram.com/sentiments/insults.html Looking to insult someone but you don't want to do it face to face? Well, as long as it isn't me, check out this site. It's pretty funny. That's it for this week! /(*) | / | |\--------------------------------------------\ (@)(((((((( | >-------------------------------------------- > | |/--------------------------------------------/ | \ \(*) > BIO SECTION: >=20 | Your BR Name: Flip | Your rl first name: Jon | Your race on BR: Beak | Where you live: calgary, AB | What you do: High School Student | Hobbies: Mostly HTML and design. I spent hours designing prototype pages that look cool, and then I delete them. I'm working on a page right now that demos the best of this stuff. =20 | Favorite thing about BR: The socializing, mostly. | Thing that annoys you most rl/br: IRL? Homework. in BR? Stupid, stupid questions >:) | Your favorite BR food (other than pot pies!) Herring. =20 | Your strangest experience ever: Talking to Aura :) /(*) | / | |\--------------------------------------------\ (@)(((((((( | >-------------------------------------------- > | |/--------------------------------------------/ | \ \(*) >WEIRDNUZ.532 (News of the Weird, April 17, 1998) >by Chuck Shepherd >Lead Stories > >* In March, two Missouri legislators proposed a law to have the >state give $1,000 to any married couple over age 21 who do not >have sexually transmitted diseases, who have no children prior to >the marriage, who have not aborted a fetus, and who were not >previously married. The law would establish official Missouri >policies of chastity and faithfulness.=20 > >* In March, Rogers, Ark., software developer Rick Bray introduced >his TVGuardian sound monitor, which silences offensive words in >television dialogue and prints tamer substitutes as captions on the >screen. Bray expanded George Carlin's "seven words you can't >say" to about 100, and says his device can analyze surrounding >dialogue so that, for example, "God" will be muted only when used >irreverently. (An earlier version of the software captioned "Dick >Van Dyke" as "jerk Van gay.")=20 > >* Serious Grudges: In Sissonville, W. Va., in March, Darrell >Carpenter drove a front-end loader through his two-story house, >flattening it, rather than honor a court order to sell the house and >split the profits with his estranged wife. The next day, in Sayville, >N.Y., Richard Hellenschmidt, 45, who owed the title to his 35-foot >boat to a bail bond company, blew the boat up by igniting propane >fumes, rather than surrender it.=20 > >Absolutely the Worst Defense Ever > >* In March, three men in Ogden, Utah, were arrested for rape, and >according to police, two admitted their roles in the crime.=20 >However, the police said, Alberto Salgado, 18, gave a different >story: While his buddies held the woman down, an unknown >person pushed Salgado on top of her, and he "accidentally" >penetrated her because his fly was open since he had just returned >from using the restroom. As he kept trying to get up, according to >the police account reported in the Ogden Standard-Examiner, the >unknown person pushed him back down, again and again, until he >had a sexual climax.=20 > >"International Balance of Cats" Deficit > >* Two more houses were revealed in March to be public-health >problems because owners had allowed cat-breeding to get out of >hand. 54 cats were found in a house in a neighborhood of semi- >luxury homes in Tarpon Springs, Fla., and 34 were found in an >Edmonton, Alberta, house whose owner insisted, "There is no >smell. The neighbors are simply neurotic." Meanwhile, authorities >in Vietnam said they are being overrun with rats (despite having >exterminated 55 million last year) and blame the problem on the >number of cats being taken out of circulation as food delicacies >bound for China.=20 > >Tough Job > >* Movie producer Warren Weideman announced in February that >his company would make a crime-and-intrigue adventure film for >the Showtime cable channel based on the work of U. S. Postal >Service inspectors and said he hopes it will improve the Postal >Service's reputation. Several years ago, Weideman worked for >USPS scanning movie scripts, trying to find places to insert >positive images of the Postal Service and admitted there were "not >that many."=20 > >Why Coin Thieves Have to Be Careful > >* In February, police in Corpus Christi, Tex., said they planned to >charge a 34-year-old man in a spree of gumball machine thefts.=20 >They were tipped by the suspect's landlord, who said the man paid >his weekly rent in quarters and that when he went to collect one >week, he saw a huge pile of Jawbreakers on the floor. And Charles >James Harding, 31, was arrested in January in Bountiful, Utah, and >charged with stealing as much as $250,000 a year from vending >machines (including some in the lobbies of police departments).=20 >Police had gone to a house seeking another man on a drug charge, >but Harding was there, too, along with a large box of quarters >whose existence neither man could adequately explain.=20 > >The Only Thing O. J. Didn't Try > >* The Sleepwalking Defense to homicide finally made its way to >the U. S. in February after having achieved success in a famous >case in Canada 10 years ago. Phoenix, Ariz., inventor Scott Louis >Falater said he was sound asleep during the time he stabbed his >wife 44 times and during the time neighbors watched him hold his >wife's head underwater in a backyard swimming pool. Just as the >Canadian defendant had supposedly driven 14 miles to his mother- >in-law's home while asleep and beat her with a tire iron, Falater >managed to put on gloves, kill the woman, bandage a cut, and >dispose of his bloody clothes, all while asleep. Not impossible, >said an expert on sleep disorders.=20 > >Government in Action > >* In February, Houston, Tex., City Councilman Rob Todd sent the >vice squad to investigate Myrtle Freeman's Condoms & More shop, >but they turned up no violations. Frustrated, Todd, noting that the >novelty inventory included chocolate lollipops shaped like breasts >and items like "edible panties," then sent the health department in >to close the store for not having a license to serve pre-packaged >food. To avoid closing, the condom store chose to discontinue its >grocery section.=20 > >* In October, the town of Morris, Ala., came within a few days of >having IRS commandeer its assets to satisfy a $60,000 back-tax >bill, but it came up with the money by mortgaging City Hall. To >solve a similar problem, Mayor Zenon Chica of El Palme, Peru, >proposed in March to auction off City Hall altogether and had lined >up four bidders willing to start at about $350,000.=20 > >* In November, Oregon State University physics professor John >Gardner had a federal grant application rejected, apparently solely >because it was not typed double-spaced. (Gardner, himself, is >blind; he was applying to work on technology for the disabled.) =20 >And in December, the Georgia Court of Appeals turned down, >irrevocably, an appeal by the state in a $2.7 million personal-injury >case because the state's paperwork was submitted in New Times >Roman typeface instead of the required Courier.=20 > >* The Horror of Barking Fish: The new pet nuisance code adopted >in January by the city council of Palm Beach Gardens, Fla., permits >a maximum of four pets, except that five is permissible if none >weighs more than 10 pounds, and ten is permissible if none weighs >more than one pound, and 25 is permissible (no more) if they are >all fish.=20 > >* In Pittsburgh, Pa., in September, Francis Glancy, 41, with a >blood-alcohol reading more than three times the legal limit, fell off >his bike, knocking himself out, and was charged with DUI under a >1993 ruling that makes a bicycle a "vehicle." However, the statute >permits first-offenders to avoid a conviction if they get counseling >and agree to a 30-day driver's license suspension. Glancy had no >driver's license so the judge told him to apply for one, then allow it >to be suspended for 30 days so he could get the conviction erased.=20 > >Recurring Themes > >* The Beat Goes On in Texas: Donald Wayne Martin killed his >wife, two stepchildren, and himself in January. Michael Wayne >Hall and another white supremacist were arrested In February in >the killing of a woman. And faring better was Wesley Wayne >Miller, who was finally approved for imminent parole after serving >16 years for the murder of a woman.=20 > >* The latest man to shock mourners by walking in to his own >funeral, according to a March Reuters report from Bahia Blanca, >Argentina, was Robinson Gonzalez, 21. (His mother had >mistakenly identified a shooting victim as her son.) Unlike in at >least one of the previous instances, in which the mother of the >"deceased" died of shock upon seeing that her offspring was still >alive, Mrs. Gonzalez merely suffered an anxiety attack.=20 _____________________________________________________________________ | _____ __ ___ ___ ____ ___ ___ ____ __ _ _ _ _____ | | | | |__| |__/ |__/ |_ | | |__/ |_ |__| | | | | | | | |_____\ | | | \ | \ |___ | | | \ |___ | | |___ | | | \_____ | | | | ___ ____ ____ _ ____ _____ _____ ____ ___ | | | ______/ | | |_ | | | \__ | |_ | | |_ |__/ _____/ | | ________| | |___ \_|_/ ___/ |___ |___ | | |___ | \________ | |_____________________________________________________________________| | | | No such thing as a failure who keeps trying...coasting to the bottom| | Is the only disgrace...-Blues Traveller | |_____________________________________________________________________| | | | Be sure to check out the Official Barren Realms Homepage | | http://nightfall.simplenet.com/Kiri | |_____________________________________________________________________| | | | -> Barren Realms: barren.coredcs.com:8000 <- | |_____________________________________________________________________| | | | You can contact me at Kiri@li.net for any of the following: | | | | Ideas for Barren Realms | | | | Questions/Complaints | | | | Your scrapbook memories of BR | | | | Your poetry, stories, questions, comments, and bios for the | | mort/hero/imm bio section of the newsletter and BR Magazine. | | | | Getting on the mail list for: | | | | Players file: How to play the game, helps, and the BR story. | | Great information for ALL players, no matter what | | level. | | | | Builders guide: An all new guide on how to build areas for BR. | | Full of new information on bits, liquids, and a | | step by step instruction on building areas. | | | | Builders forum: A place to ask email questions about the area you | | are building | | | | Area list: A list of areas and descriptions of each, in depth | | and helpful | | | \_____________________________________________________________________/ Ascii by Cutlass-Mark Sherlock-msherlo@ibm.net Kelemvor: It'd be nice if ID could show the level of air left in scuba-type gear Kiri: Yeah, actually. I think that's pretty cool. Maybe in percentage? Nakita: a spell called sagacity which increases wisdom Nakita: i think if mobs can steal gold from us, we should be able to steal gold from them... at least some classes Kiri: Called Kenders ;) AMystery: a get all except command. something like get all corpse ! doll for get all from corpse except dolls Nakita: global socials can do CERTAIN socials to people even though their not in the room Nakita: a mesmorize spell that will lure a mob from an adjacent room to your room Kai: Make a spell only for mobs that let's them lower levels. :-) Muhaha. Kai: $undo command on Connect 4, has to have other players consent though. Spudman: i think you should make colored small bags,so we can put diff items in each,like pies in one,skins in another,elixirs in another and so on...it would be veryorganized..hehe Kiri: not a bad idea for an area writer. AMystery: speaking as one who just got two packs and several other things fried. It would be really nice if heroed didn't get containers fried. make it easier to help new heroes and keep head collections:) Kiri: just an overall point, I would appreciate it if people DIDNT keep head/heart collections. They tend to explode and corrupt pfiles. Nakita: what about a HIGHLANDER area :-) Kiri: If you focus on the historical aspects, go for it. Rabies: Mobs should react to socials by attacking more often if the social is rude, with of course a random factor thrown in. A possible formula:=20 IF ((mob's alignment) + (social's rudeness factor) + (random(500)) - 250) < -1000, THEN the player will get attacked. That way nasty evil mobs will be much more likely to attack players than genial old healers like Clericus. Of course, the social's rudeness factor would vary wildly, slaps rated at -1000, a Bronx cheer at -750, and a smile at +100. =20 Shouldn't be hard to code, the hardest part would be rating the socials. I= f you decide to implement it, I volunteer for that task. Also, as a further suggestion, socialing mobs would possibly change their alignment a bit; tha= t way after multiple slaps Clericus would become annoyed and irritable (and start tending toward evil) and ready to frag the next rude customer. -"Rabies", whatever.... /(*) | / | |\--------------------------------------------\ (@)(((((((( | >-------------------------------------------- > | |/--------------------------------------------/ | \ \(*) Ahh, the power of flight: Held by all, but mastered by few. For those who have practiced the great skill of aerodynamics a challenge awaits you. Rising high above the city of Calathar, the Astral Plane holds the mighties= t of Demons and harnesses power beyond all imagination. Wandering aimlessly through the endless maze, you will encounter Ghosts, evil hunters, and even your worst Nightmares. Beware, many of these dark creatures roam here seeking revenge for their banishment to this endless maze. Many will not thing twice before attack the likes of you. =91Tis rumored there is a weap= on which increases the wielders dexterity by massive amounts, a useful tool fo= r those nimble thieves and humans. If you are lucky enough to find the end o= f the maze, through the mist lies the Queen of the Astral Plane. The mighty Lich Queen, bearer of the sacred flail and black pentagram. Her unholy magic enables her to defeat even the greatest player, who=92s flesh she wil= l hungrily feed on. Beware the wrath of the Queen and her minions. Divebomb /(*) | / | |\--------------------------------------------\ (@)(((((((( | >-------------------------------------------- > | |/--------------------------------------------/ | \ \(*) >BIO SECTION: > >Your BR Name:Josta >Your rl first name:Stephan >Your race on BR:Avian >Where you live:Virginia >What you do:Student >Hobbies:Graphic Design, webdesign, Mudding, Band, Being Odd >Favorite thing about BR: its relaxing >Thing that annoys you most rl/br:avian avatar's suck :P (well compared=20 to all other races as avatars) > >Your favorite BR food (other than pot pies!) > mmmm pot pies, humm, well gotta be Josta! >Your strangest experience ever: > My whole life ;) /(*) | / | |\--------------------------------------------\ (@)(((((((( | >-------------------------------------------- > | |/--------------------------------------------/ | \ \(*) The Response to the survey, compiled by KAI: Here's the compiled and sorted list of the survey responses. ---- Barren Realms Newsletter Survery Results ---- Favorite Part: Least Favorite Part: ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Bios: 4 Bios: 3 Ideas: 11 Ideas: 2 Response: 9 Response: 1 Area Descriptions: 4 Area Descriptions: 2 Articles: 1 Articles: 2 Technical Guru: 1 Technical Guru: 3 URL's: 0 URL's: 3 Silly: 8 Silly: 0 None: 0 None: 8 Suggestions for a New Section: ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Get to know your Imm. What it takes to be an Imm, their favorite areas of BR. Make them more personable. See more of the ideas in the Response section actually implemented. Make each section larger. A Hints/Tips section. A BR Follies section, where players could talk about adventures gone wrong while playing BR. An ASCII Picture Gallery. A MVP Section where ordinary players are honored for helping out others. An actual News section, telling about recent events on BR. Glad to be of service, Kai /(*) | / | |\--------------------------------------------\ (@)(((((((( | >-------------------------------------------- > | |/--------------------------------------------/ | \ \(*) Kiri's Wide World of URLs: SILLY: How to tell if your cow has Mad cow's disease, thanks to HENTAI: http://www.geocities.com/Hollywood/Lot/2437/madcow.html Virtual Mom, for all you college kids who miss your mothers :P http://dearmom.infospace.com/mtalk/m_talk.htm USEFUL/INTERESTING: Footage Net, its an online archive of historical footage: http://www.footage.net/ The Daily briefing has a configurable news server for those of you who get your news off the net: http://www.dailybriefing.com/ Enjoy! /(*) | / | |\--------------------------------------------\ (@)(((((((( | >-------------------------------------------- > | |/--------------------------------------------/ | \ \(*) Be nice to your kids. They'll choose your nursing home. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder... There are 3 kinds of people: those who can count & those who can't. Sign on baby's bib: SPIT HAPPENS. Why is "abbreviation" such a long word? Don't use a big word where a diminutive one will suffice. Every morning is the dawn of a new error... A flying saucer results when a nudist spills his coffee. For people who like peace and quiet: a phoneless cord. I can see clearly now, the brain is gone.. The beatings will continue until morale improves. I used up all my sick days, so I'm calling in dead. Mental floss prevents moral decay. Madness takes its toll. Please have exact change. Proofread carefully to see if you any words out. There cannot be a crisis today; my schedule is already full. I'd explain it to you, but your brain would explode. Ever stop to think, and forget to start again? A conclusion is simply the place where you got tired of thinking. I don't have solution, but I admire the problem. Don't be so open-minded, your brains will fall out. If at first you DO succeed, try not to look astonished! Diplomacy is art of saying "Nice doggie!"...until you can find a rock. Diplomacy - the art of letting someone have your way. If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest have to drown too? If things get any worse, I'll have to ask you to stop helping me. If I want your opinion, I'll ask you to fill out the necessary forms. Don't look back, they might be gaining on you. It's not hard to meet expenses, they're everywhere. Help Wanted: Telepath. You know where to apply. Look out for #1. Don't step in #2 either. Budget: A method for going broke methodically. Car service: If it ain't broke, we'll break it. Shin: A device for finding furniture in the dark. Do witches run spell checkers? Demons are a ghouls best friends. Copywight 1994 Elmer Fudd. All wights wesewved. Dain bramaged. Department of Reduncancy Department Headline: Bear takes over Disneyland in Pooh D'Etat! What has four legs and an arm? A happy pit bull. ******* ************** *** *** ************** **** ***Barren Realms*** **** *** *** *** *** *** ******* *** *********** ** ** *********** ***************** Login: include the newest player photos in the newsletter Kiri - I sure will, soon as people start sending me more ;P Rabies: To go along with the avian's "tanning" skill... "canning". Get armor and rations from the same corpse. ;) Nakita: how about equipment that only women / men / neuters can use ? Everybody: for enhances...make it a stat, like hitpoints or such, so that you get 5 more every level, and still keep the ones that you had from the previous level that you didn't use Stonehenge: Blindness, dirtkick, curse, and spite should go up in -hit as you level. A level 115 casting blindness which is -4 hit will bring that mob's hitroll down to about 500. Just a thought. Stonehenge: Why don't shields done anything except add AC? They should add a "block" skill that blocks a foes attacks with your shield. Rabies: Here's one... allow projectiles to have spells like weapons can. For instance, a jar of acid could cast acid blast when thrown, or a jar of oil could cast fireball. If the spell works, the projectile is destroyed. If not, it remains intact and can be thrown again. -Rabies /(*) | / | |\--------------------------------------------\ (@)(((((((( | >-------------------------------------------- > | |/--------------------------------------------/ | \ \(*) BIO SECTION: Your BR Name: Bearcat (AKA Stonehenge, ImperialHQ, Chang, Bethany, Rogers, Capitane, Fokker, Sopwith, Sovereign) Your rl first name: Keith Your race on BR: Human, Druid, Illithid, Elf, Avian, and Dwarf Where you live: Wyomissing, Pennsylvania What you do: Student (9th Grade) Hobbies: Computers, friends, girls :P Favorite thing about BR: Kill things, what else? :) Thing that annoys you most rl/br: People asking you for money Your favorite BR food (other than pot pies!) Whatever I can remove from my opponent's bodies :P Your strangest experience ever: Seeing that little phrase: You have been denied access. /(*) | / | |\--------------------------------------------\ (@)(((((((( | >-------------------------------------------- > | |/--------------------------------------------/ | \ \(*) North of the well traversed eastern road lies the tunnels of Moria. The winding passages are laced with orcs, kobolds, and humans alike. The aggros wandering the area supply a true challenge for the low level mortals (5-15). If manage to find your way to the secret passage, someone has a nice pair of gloves you might be interested in. Word to the wise, though: Never eat moldy food! Divebomb /(*) | / | |\--------------------------------------------\ (@)(((((((( | >-------------------------------------------- > | |/--------------------------------------------/ | \ \(*) Kiri's URL section: Silly URLs: http://www-leland.stanford.edu/~jenkg/useless.html This is a series of funny trvia. Enjoy! http://www.d-day2k.com/clinton/clinton.html This is for all you Clinton-haters. Its pretty sick, but funny. Useful URLs: http://www.mtv.com/mtv/amp_mu_launch.html This contains many links and is the homepage for MTV's AMP. Enjoy it if you like alternative music. From Oakley. http://www.salonmagazine.com/ This is an online magazine that's been around a long time. It has intelligent conversations and articles. Scavenger pointed me in this direction. /(*) | / | |\--------------------------------------------\ (@)(((((((( | >-------------------------------------------- > | |/--------------------------------------------/ | \ \(*) This is written by our very own Slart. It's a brilliant, extremely humorous piece. I hope you enjoy it and realize how much creativity something like this would take. --- The Usenet Oracle has pondered your question deeply. Your question was: O great Oracle, the one who sees all and knows all, please accept this humble question from thy grovelling supplicant... Why is Windows 95 Beta so bug-ridden it's not funny? And in response, thus spake the Oracle: THE SCENE: A dark chamber of the Gates estate, dimly lit by three 20" monitors suspended from the ceiling. In the middle of the room is a Pentium/100MHz, sheathed in a black casing. Three programmers dance around the machine, chanting horribly. Their pale, clammy complexion is cast hideously by the light of the monitors, rendered even more repugnant to the watchful eye by the 75Hz flicker of the monitors. FIRST PROGRAMMER: Thrice the brinded net hath mewed. SECOND PROGRAMMER: Thrice, and once the Warp-pig whined. THIRD PROGRAMMER: MacHarpier cries. 'Tis time, 'tis time! FIRST: Round about the terminal go; In the poisoned upgrade throw. Code, which by a student done In minutes numbering sixty-one. Run-time error, protection fault, Crash ye first, crash ye shalt. ALL [as they dance around the Pentium]: Double, double, toil and trouble; Tempers burn and data bubble. SECOND: Fillet of a Sound Card bake, In the Pentium no sound make; Point of arrow, click of mouse, Scream of user, frightened spouse. OS/2's net use appeal, Steve Job's look and Wozniak's feel. For a charm of powerful trouble, Like a hell-broth boil and bubble. ALL: Double, double, toil and trouble; Tempers burn and data bubble. THIRD: Click "Start" button, speed of slug, You would think you forgot the plug. Multitasking, ha ha ho If just one worked you'd be good to go. This should grab those straggling few Who aren't using DOS 6.22. Now we shall the Mac eclipse, While curse words cross our users' lips. Leave the errors in so we can fix And sell more...Windows 96! And so we will release the Beta For corruption of their data. ALL: Double, double, toil and trouble; Users buy, our profits double. SECOND: Compile it with errors through, Since the users have no clue. [Enter BillGate to the other three programmers.] BillGate: O well done! I commend your pains, And everyone shall share i' the gains. And now about the program get, But NEVER use it on OUR net. Security is scarce put in. [Beeps of PONG heard in the background.] [Exit BillGate.] SECOND WITCH: By the usage of my UMBs Wicked Windows this way comes. Open locks, Whoever knocks! [Fade to black.] Remember, Obsolescence isn't an accident, it's an art form. You owe the Oracle a signed, handwritten manuscript of MacBeth, and a copy of the Windows upgrade for the P6. --- (it may be a little long, but I"m sure you agree it was well worth it!) AMystery: It is nice to get all the spells at lvl 151, but the mana drain is annoying. Especially for those who didn't have magic before. how about changing it so the spells all take 5 mana? instead of 100? Spudman: i think we need more teller machines besides the bank and casino Spudman: i think if you have an alignment of 1000 you should have an automatic sanc,but if it hits 999 or below,its gone Dunbarth: in rl people can hang things from their belt, so why not have that available to us, have all belts be a container that can hold only weapons (1 max) Tom: make change the code for enhanced nut that way we can eat all we want but never get hungry Sorta: add dispel magic to the list of clericus and sancta's heal spells... or make it only for heroes... like restore Bluestar: Ideas for Barren Realms: 1) You know how we have a who imm, who hero ect... What if we had a who ivis directory. (For people who either have vision, see invis, or the potion, ect...) 2) I know that drunkeness is the consequince of drinking beer for us mortals, but what if when we type tellh it be like chath so we can see what the drunk people are saying, it gets annoying trying to talk to someone while their drunk and not be able to u nderstand them. 3)I think a notice list would be nice. It would be a lot eaiser the typing who, or whois such and such to see if they are on. Have the max amount be six or something. Thats it for this time. Just my two....no...three cents worth. =3D) =3D) = =3D) =3D) -Bluestar /(*) | / | |\--------------------------------------------\ (@)(((((((( | >-------------------------------------------- > | |/--------------------------------------------/ | \ \(*) A vast, difficult to access land awaits the true adventurer. The land of th= e Arabian Nights is laden with difficult enemies, but the successful fighter will reap the great rewards. All the mobs from those childhood stories roa= m the deserts and palaces of the Arabian Nights. If a traveller manages to get past the first door, they will be confronted by the fearsome brass dragon. He holds a powerful scroll for the wounded traveller as well as the key to the door. After meandering through the desert for awhile you may come across a palace or two. Scheherazade sits near the entrance to one wit= h the captivated King Shahryar. She's a toughie, but her powerful book has ten charges of fun for the looter. Wander a little farther in and you are bound to come across a few nasties like the Magician and Thief. The thief has a prize you could run back and show your friends in Calathar - at least it's proof you made it there and back alive! For those high level players, seek out Aladdin and the princess. If you manage to get past them, why not take on Ali's mom, too? After you've finished them off, why not walk aroun= d the marketplace a bit. There's a couple servants flying around - hmmm, wonder how they do that. Even Sinbad's there, turban and all, ready to tak= e his voyages again. You can participate in his adventures your self. Maybe you'll even find a cool feather somewhere. The Arabian Nights is a beautifully designed area with fabulous descriptions as well as challenging mobs. Even if you don't want to fight, at least take a walk through the land. But careful!, that desert gets hot! Divebomb ******* ************** *** *** ************** **** ***Barren Realms*** **** *** *** *** *** *** ******* *** *********** ** ** *********** ***************** BIO SECTION: =20 Your BR Name: Mystique Your rl first name: Barbara Your race on BR: Druid Where you live: St. Augustine, FL What you do: College journalism instructor Hobbies: Love to read, listen to music ranging from classic rock to long-= hair classical to new age stuff, garden a bit, play BR when I can Favorite thing about BR: All the fantastic people who play it Thing that annoys you most rl/br: Meanness//nodrop/noremove items =20 Your favorite BR food (other than pot pies!) Body parts (jk) =20 Your strangest experience ever: rl there are too many to pick from--I could write several "Touched by an Angel" or "One Step Beyond" episodes; in BR, well, anything can happen in Wonderland and often does :) =20 ----------------------------------------- /(*) | / | |\--------------------------------------------\ (@)(((((((( | >-------------------------------------------- > | |/--------------------------------------------/ | \ \(*) >Technical Guru's Newsletter > >Sorry for the last couple of weeks, between lots going on in my=20 personal=20 >life, and the school computers downloading at 128 bytes/sec (slow for=20 >any fax/modem, but REALLY bad for a T1 line), there has not been enough=20 >time to get the article out. I hope that I can get them out as=20 >regularly from now on. > > > >The internet is considered one of the greater non-medical inventions of=20 >the last, say, 10 years or so. Starting with two computers connected=20 >together, then with 2400 baud modems, and now where we use satelitte=20 >technology, and other cordless technology, it is faster than ever to=20 get=20 >information that we need. Of course, not all information that we can=20 >get on the internet is needed. Sadly, although a great help to many,=20 >the internet, with it's vices such as gambling and pornography, can=20 also=20 >be a downfall. > >That pornography and gambling would come on the internet was=20 inevidable. =20 >Hey, people won't always be good, and I can accept that. If people were=20 >always good little boys/girls, would we have had WW1 and WW2, Vietnam=20 >and the Gulf war? If we were as good as one might wish, then we would=20 >not be human. Now, we might not LIKE the fact that docile serches=20 >almost inevitably bring up chances for our children to view such sick,=20 >disgusting things, it may turn all our stomachs. > >There are, however, ways to get around this. NetNanny is an example of=20 >one of many programs designed to prevent our children from reading that=20 >which they should not. Of course, as any internet designer worth his=20 >salt will tell you, these programs are far from useful. Many work by=20 >examining META tags {found at the start of the document, provide key=20 >words that describe the site}, for adult natured words. Things like=20 >porn, xxx, naked people... [no more detail than that] will be blocked=20 >out. The way around that? Simple. DON'T USE META TAGS. Instead, get=20 >advertising on sites, get links that way. =20 > >Now, some programs will actually search all of a site's content (words,=20 >META tags, pictures) for anything that might be considered=20 questionable. =20 >This is a more foolproof way of garding, but is not without it's=20 >downfalls. For example, any program configured to block out any=20 >document with the word 'xxx' would probably block out this EMail. That=20 >which searches pictures, has a hard time deciding what exactly is bad. =20 >Do we allow some shoulder, a little chest, mabye the tops of breasts? =20 >And at the bottom, up to mid-leg? Calf? > >You see, a program is not a person. It cannot be offended by anything.=20 >It cannot decide on its own what is bad. Now, I shudder at the thought=20 >of actually trying to code these types of things. There are, however,=20 >easier ways. > >Jesse Berst, editor for Anchordesk (www.anchordesk.com), has the right=20 >idea. In a recent article, he suggested that all pornography must have=20 >the address www.{anypornsite}.red Make all pornographic pages have a=20 >.red ending. Fast, simple. Sorry, Jesse, won't work. If the United=20 >States adopts this as law, and either the FBI or local police actually=20 >enforce it, then you will, inevitably, cut down on the pornography on=20 >.com; .org pages. What it will not do, however, is get rid of anything=20 >in other countries. Even if the UN made it a world law, and developed=20 a=20 >global police force (in the mode of interpol), then full compliance=20 >would not be obtained. How can the UN force someone, say Canada, say=20 >Russia, say Cuba, to comply to these rules. Perhaps Canada and Russia=20 >will, we are afraid of losing help from the UN, but Cuba? =20 > >My blunt editorialism? > >GET USED TO IT, PORNOGRAPHY WILL BE A PART OF THE WORLD WIDE WEB FOR A=20 >LOOOOONG TIME. > >I'm Muddman, and this is my TechNews. >Next week, TechNews takes a look at online gambling. /(*) | / | |\--------------------------------------------\ (@)(((((((( | >-------------------------------------------- > | |/--------------------------------------------/ | \ \(*) Kiri's Wide World of URLS: USEFUL PAGES: Especially for MUDders. http://www.mudconnect.com/mpd/index.html This site is a web directory of Mud players. Find an old friend, discover what they're up to now. Or register, and let others find you. http://www.findagrave.com/ Okay, maybe this is only -somewhat- useful. From Jello and Dagmar, the MAKERS of eccentric, yes, you can find a grave of almost any celebrity you can THINK of. Silly pages: http://www.insset.u-picardie.fr/museum/english/pages_site/page_start.htm The self-described museum of Dead, Gone and Obsolete Computers. Check it out! http://www.middle-earth.com/map.html And this is a page of those who wish to preserve the tolkien-inspired feel of the net. Those of you who enjoy fantasy books might enjoy this page.. /(*) | / | |\--------------------------------------------\ (@)(((((((( | >-------------------------------------------- > | |/--------------------------------------------/ | \ \(*) >Picture yourself near a stream. >> Birds are singing in the crisp, cool mountain air. >> Nothing can bother you here. No one knows this secret place. >> You are in total seclusion from that place called the world. >> The soothing sound of a gentle waterfall fills the air with a >> cascade of serenity. >> The water is clear. >> You can easily make out the face of the person whose head you're >> holding under the water. >> There now, feeling better? > > > _____________________________________________________________________ | _____ __ ___ ___ ____ ___ ___ ____ __ _ _ _ _____ | | | | |__| |__/ |__/ |_ | | |__/ |_ |__| | | | | | | | |_____\ | | | \ | \ |___ | | | \ |___ | | |___ | | | \_____ | | | | ___ ____ ____ _ ____ _____ _____ ____ ___ | | | ______/ | | |_ | | | \__ | |_ | | |_ |__/ _____/ | | ________| | |___ \_|_/ ___/ |___ |___ | | |___ | \________ | |_____________________________________________________________________| | | | No such thing as a failure who keeps trying...coasting to the bottom| | Is the only disgrace...-Blues Traveller | |_____________________________________________________________________| | | | Be sure to check out the Official Barren Realms Homepage | | http://nightfall.simplenet.com/Kiri | |_____________________________________________________________________| | | | -> Barren Realms: barren.coredcs.com:8000 <- | |_____________________________________________________________________| | | | You can contact me at Kiri@li.net for any of the following: | | | | Ideas for Barren Realms | | | | Questions/Complaints | | | | Your scrapbook memories of BR | | | | Your poetry, stories, questions, comments, and bios for the | | mort/hero/imm bio section of the newsletter and BR Magazine. | | | | Getting on the mail list for: | | | | Players file: How to play the game, helps, and the BR story. | | Great information for ALL players, no matter what | | level. | | | | Builders guide: An all new guide on how to build areas for BR. | | Full of new information on bits, liquids, and a | | step by step instruction on building areas. | | | | Builders forum: A place to ask email questions about the area you | | are building | | | | Area list: A list of areas and descriptions of each, in depth | | and helpful | | | \_____________________________________________________________________/ Ascii by Cutlass-Mark Sherlock-msherlo@ibm.net