Barren Realms MUD

did you ever eat that? well, i just did. first i thought i'd have to go get me another cup, now i feel sick.

yupp, i'm bored. that was it! hehe. move along

and no, it didn't taste as well as i hoped it would.

just as long as it isn't blood pudding, count me in for seconds
warm pudding is VERY good when done well, but is rarely done well. cold pudding is harder to screw up

What about instant pudding? I ate vanilla flavored instant pudding with banana slices in it once. I didn't die.

mmmm... warm butterscotch pudding *drools* Even better if it's cooled down just enough to get a skin on top. *drools again*

Please tell me you guys don't like instant pudding!
btw, EB said it before me, but warm butterscotch pudding with the skin on it is to die for
Have you ever tried making butterscotch pudding with hazlenut creamer instead of milk? Sounds gross but it's oh so good

Bluei-Goddess of weird confections

No, I am the goddess of wierd confections thanks!

Here are some of my weirder yummy finds....
Ketchup on eggs
Ketchup and cheese and eggs on grits
Pancakes with bar b que sauce
peanut butter on pancakes with syrup
chili with tortilla strips in it

Thats all I can think of right now. And yes I do truly eat this and think it is tastey!!!

Ketchup is the devil.

The proof resides in the story of the origin of ketchup...

DEEP IN A SPOOKY-LOOKING UNDERGROUND LABORATORY

INVENTOR #1
(to inventor #2 across a lab table)
Hey, dude, let's take a perfectly good tomato and make it into a tasteless paste!

INVENTOR #2
Sounds good to me!

INVENTOR #1
Ok, how do we do it? I don't know the first thing about cooking stuff.

INVENTOR #2
I don't know anything about that stuff either.

INVENTOR #1
I know! Let's make a pact with the devil.

INVENTOR #2
Great idea. Let me start the incantations.

(Inventor #2 begins drawing pentagrams on the table.
Smoke and fire billows about the room, as an evil black robed demon appears, standing on the table and carrying a pitchfork.)

THE DEVIL
Why hast thou summoned me, puny mortals?

INVENTOR #1
Hey there, devil guy. We want to make a tasteless paste out of a perfectly good tomato. Can you help us out?

THE DEVIL
That sounds ing. I'll do it! The cost...

(Inventor #1 and Inventor #2 look at each other worriedly)

THE DEVIL
Thou shalt lose thy souls into darkness, of course, but this I charge you as well; the first that doth consume but one drop only of this most evil of concoctions, then that pitiable soul shalt be as one with the tasteless paste, becoming that which thou hast so cruelly inflicted upon the world. In this way, this evil shall be carried on unto eternity.

(Inventor #1 and Inventor #2 agree, and the Devil casts his evil spell. A bottle appears on a table in front of the inventors. The Devil disappears.)

INVENTOR #2
(looking around)
Did you understand what he said about becoming one with the paste?

INVENTOR #1
(confused)
I'm not sure. Did he mean only if we eat it plain? What if we put it on a sandwich? What do you think we should do?

INVENTOR #2
I think we should ask the Devil again, just in case.

(Inventor #1 agrees, and they start tracing over the pentagrams again. Smoke and fire billow about the room as an evil black robed demon appears carrying a pitchfork.)

THE DEVIL
Why hast thou once again disturbed the scourge of goodness, foolish mortals?

INVENTOR #1
We were just confused by something you said. Did you mean if we eat the paste by itself, or is it ok if we put it on a sandwich?

THE DEVIL
Did you forget our contract so easily, foolish mortals?

INVENTOR #1
I suppose we could try some and see what happens.

(The Devil glances at the inventors with a gleam in his eye.)

INVENTOR #2
Ok, here goes. I'll smear a spoonful on a sandwich.

(Inventor #2 makes a sandwich, slopping on a large amount of the paste before cautiously holding it up to his mouth. Then he shrugs his shoulders and takes a large bite. When nothing happens, he eats the rest of the sandwich)

INVENTOR #1
How was it, dude?

INVENTOR #2
Pretty tasteless.

THE DEVIL
(angry and astonished)
What magic is this? Thou shouldst surely be as one with the paste by now.

(Inventor #1, emboldened by his friend's action, cautiously holds the bottle up to his mouth and swallows a huge mouthful. Nothing happens. The Devil is incensed.)

INVENTOR #1
You know, this really is pretty tasteless. You want to try some, devil guy? You did a great job.

(Both inventors start gulping down the tasteless paste by the mouthfuls. They both talk about how much the Devil would need to eat just to catch up to them.)

THE DEVIL
(grabbing the bottle)
Thou shalt not make a fool of the Devil. Behold, tiny mortals, as I too consume that which thou doest foolishly flaunt before thy doom.

(The Devil tips the bottle up and cautiously lets one drop slip out of the bottle into his mouth. He smacks his lips)

THE DEVIL
You know, this is pretty tasteless...

(The devil can say no more as swirls of darkness coalesce about him and his evil essence is trapped within the bottle, with nothing left behind but the echoes of his unearthly screams)

INVENTOR #1
(holding up the bottle to inspect it)
He's become one with the paste now. All he wanted was to eat as much as us. Do you think he will be able to eat the stuff in there?

INVENTOR #2
If so, then I guess that means he'll "catch up" after all.

THE END

So you see, ketchup really is the devil.

Actually, the only one of those that sounds really odd (and I haven't heard before) is the ketchup, cheese and eggs on grits. Although pancakes with bbq is pretty odd, as well, I can accept it, seeing as I eat barbeque sauce on just about everything. (Like sandwiches.)

How about french fries dipped in a vanilla shake, MmmmMMMMM, or pizza made with cream cheese or sour cream

Bluei

Back when i used to like french fries, i put them on my hamburgers. I also put potato chips on my cold sandwiches with mayonnaise. shore is yummy!

btw, french fries, potato chips and mayonnaise are the devil too. The story of their origins are surprisining familiar. I will refrain from showing them to you, however.

my brother used to dip raw carrots into ketchup and eat them *gags*
when you say eggs with ketchup, how are the eggs cooked? scrambled eggs with ketchup, sure, but soft-boiled just sounds nasty

Anything with ketchup sounds nasty.
Remember, if you eat ketchup, then you are eating communism.

i almost fell off my chair when i read your story, stars thanks for posting. however, i was wondering...

how would you make the word joke match french fries, potato chips and mayonaise?

I guess there is no bad pun I can apply to those other things. They just happen to be evil, that's all.

Stars your obsession with evil condiments is rather disturbing, but we love you anyway

Bluei